This weekend was the long-awaited ranch sorting event. Mr. B has been talking about attending an event like this for at least 6 months. We finally found ourselves free (it’s been a busy summer!) on an event weekend and committed to meeting our friend Ryan in McKean, PA to see what it was all about.
Mr. B was so excited. I mean, so excited. On Friday night he was like a little kid on Christmas Eve buzzing around with excitement. He loaded all the gear into the truck, hooked the horse trailer to the truck, bathed both horses and even clipped their chin hairs. Because you have to be beautiful to play with cows, duh.
Sally didn’t mind the bath at first.
But eventually she started giving Mr. B dirty looks.
No worries, he handled it pretty well. Living with me, he’s used to ladies getting sassy with him.
So Saturday morning everything was ready to go. (Well, as ready as we were going to get. The freshly washed
asshole horse pictured above rolled in her own poop at some point during the night, but we didn’t have time to do anything about that.) We woke up at an unacceptable hour (5:30! On a Saturday!), loaded the horses onto the trailer and hit the road.
About an hour and a half into a two and a half hour ride, Joey decided to body-slam my bladder, so we pulled over at a rest area. When I came out of the restroom, Mr. B was standing next to the trailer looking panicked and waving me over frantically. “We have a problem”, he said and pointed to this:
In all of my helpfulness, I responded with “Oh….Shit. Yeah, we do.” We didn’t just get a flat or blow out a tire. The whole freaking wheel fell off. How does that even happen?!
We have no idea how long the wheel was missing, but we suspect only a mile or so. We felt the trailer shift shortly before we pulled off at the rest area, but assumed that it was just the horses moving. This is pretty common (they have more than 2,000 lbs between them, so you feel the movement when even one of them takes a step to the side) and Mr. B checked the rear-view mirror and didn’t see anything out of the ordinary. Like, you know, a tire rolling away from the trailer.
Luckily, we were in the left lane, so the wheel likely just rolled into the median. We were very, very fortunate that no one was hurt.
Ryan was already at the event, but he loaded his horse, Cash, back onto his trailer and drove the hour to meet us at the rest stop. While we waited for him, Mr. B called around to see if there were any nearby spare tire trailer retailers. Naturally, I started taking pictures.
Well, do you know what is in the middle of Mercer County? A whole bunch of nothing. There was nothing nearby and the calls he made to places 30+ miles away all came up empty. Awesome.
Several of our fellow travelers did stop to see if they could help, and many even offered up their spare tires, but sadly, none fit. Mr. B did spot one gentleman who had a spare tire that was a match, and asked if he could buy it from him, but the guy refused to part with it. For any amount of money.
When Ryan arrived, Mr. B and I unloaded Sally and Annie from our trailer, with the intention of loading them onto Ryan’s trailer. Sally did this with no problem. Annie, however, decided that a busy rest area along the equally busy interstate 79 was a great place to tell Mr. B to shove it. So she did. Repeatedly.
She fought him so hard that he was afraid she would hurt herself, or worse, get loose and end up on the interstate. He had no choice but to load her back onto the busted trailer.
Sidenote/rant/public service announcement: If you ever see frazzled people taking their horses off of a trailer at a rest area, just go ahead and assume that it is not the best opportunity to introduce your toddler farm animals. Clearly, something is wrong so for everyone’s safety and the sanity of the horse owners, stay back. Especially if one of the horses is so distraught that she is rearing up onto her hind legs repeatedly. Seriously, dude. GO AWAY. Take Junior to a petting zoo. This is not the time or the place. Sure, watch from afar because, yeah, that’s bizarre. But DO NOT carry your small child over and attempt to approach the obviously unhappy 1,000-lb animal or it’s struggling handlers.
Sorry. Where was I? Oh yeah, Sally was on Ryan’s trailer with Cash, and Annie was back on the busted trailer. Mr. B sent me with Ryan so that he could head back to the event. We felt so awful that we had to ask him to come save us and didn’t want to ruin his whole day. Mr. B shipped me off with him so that I could go check it out/tend to my horse, but mostly I think he was just so irritated with the whole thing that he wanted to be left alone. He was going to find a truck stop/parts shop and meet up with us once the trailer was fixed.
We followed him verrrry slowly down the highway to the next exit, where he found a nice man at a truck parts shop. That shop didn’t have what they needed, so Mr. B’s new buddy spent almost two hours calling every place he could think of to inquire about what is apparently a very old, aftermarket Ford truck wheel and tire. Eventually, they located one at a junkyard. It was similar, but not the exact one, so the man at the junkyard somehow altered it to fit just well enough to get us home.
6 hours and $175 later (for not even the right wheel or tire!), Mr. B and Annie finally joined us at the ranch sorting event. They arrived just in time for Mr. B to get Annie all saddled up and participate in the event. It ended up being a great day, despite the travel troubles.
This post is getting pretty long and there is still so much more to tell, show and explain! Come back tomorrow for part two of this post, where I tell you all about the event and explain what the hell ranch sorting is all about.
I’m linking up with Sami today for my first Weekend Shenanigans post!