Did you see Sarah’s post over on Venus Trapped In Mars earlier this week about what she’s got going on in her purse? She cracks me up, but I found it so intriguing! There’s something about seeing what’s in someone’s bag that I find to be so insightful. (Is that odd?) Naturally, my first thought was ohhh I want to do this!, followed quickly by hmm…better see how gross it is first.
Lucky for you (and much to my surprise) it wasn’t as filled with trash as I initially expected. What’dya know.
I’m a bit of an open book. Maybe my life is just a bit too boring, but aside from some seriously unfortunately school pictures from junior high, I don’t have much that I care about keeping hidden. So from the time we started dating, I’d invite Mr. B to grab whatever he needed from my purse. Except, here’s how it would actually play out:
Mr. B: Do you have any gum?
Me: In my purse, outside pocket.
Mr. B: [Brings me my purse. Usually holding it with out-stretched arms like it’s a bomb that may explode at any moment.]
Me: [Retrieves gum and hands it to Mr. B] You know, you could just get it yourself. That’s why I told you exactly where to find it; I really don’t care if you go in my purse.
Mr. B: Oh, Ok. I just didn’t want to go through your purse. [Still holding purse like it might sting him because I’m so amused by his discomfort that I continue to let him hold it.]
Me: No biggie, now you know.
…Until the next time he needs something that happens to be in my purse, when this exact scene replays itself again.
At first, I thought it was adorable. Oh, how sweet! He respects my privacy! Not even a little bit necessary but awww love him! But after a few years together, I’m starting to think he’d just rather not deal with the hot mess that is my handbag. It’s legit. You really never know what you are going to find in there. Here’s what’s going on with my purse today:
1// The bag. I adore Michael Kors, but I’m also kinda poor. I scored this on clearance at Macy’s. Oh, and I had a gift card. So let’s not pretend I’m all fancy with my designer goods. Also, it’s the size of a small carry-on so I love it even more because I can unnecessarily tote my entire life around.
2// Joey’s new harness because he was too chubby for his old one (and he can magically slip the collar off of his head when he doesn’t feel like being on a leash anymore.) He’s now officially a medium-sized dog. *Tear* our little baby is growing up.
3// My MK wallet/wristlet. When I don’t feel like carrying luggage around this puppy can also fit my cell phone (sans-cover) and a lip gloss. Again, don’t be impressed; I scored it on sale at Zappos.
4// A squished pack of gum with one and a half sticks of gum left. Yes, sometimes a whole piece is too much for me so I chew half pieces. Feel free to judge me.
5// A selection of lip glosses that I always have on hand but rarely use – including Smurfett Mood lip gloss (yep like a mood ring). I know, I’m an adult. Whatev, I love it.
6// Burt’s Bees lip balms. I have these stashed everywhere – I love them.
7// Day Planner. I’ve tried SO MANY TIMES to switch to my phone calendar but I just can’t. I’m old-school like that.
8// Notebook. For notes and such. Usually used for grocery lists, to-do lists and blog ideas, but it’s pretty universal.
9// Earrings. No idea why they were in my purse, but I had been looking for them for a while so I was pretty pleased to find them.
10// 9 hair bands (in assorted colors, because duh I need options), 3 bobby pins, 2 jumbo bobby pins and 1 mini hair claw. I have a lot of hair, and I never know when it will annoy me. Also, I have this theory that every time I have zero hair ties I end up needing one, but if I have, oh say, a dozen or so I won’t ever need to use any of them. Obviously there is no middle ground, so I can’t just carry one or two.
11// A sample chewy…something(?) from the checkout counter at GNC.
12// The business card of a rodeo event coordinator. Because we live in the country and play with horses and cows.
13// Fingernail clippers and gold nail polish. I have no idea. I guess at some point I thought I’d give myself a mani on the run??
14// Lotion. It annoys the crap our of me when my skin feels dry.
15// Allegra. I puff. And itch. Especially when the leaves fall.
16// Car keys. And house keys. And the only bottle openers we can ever find. (Look close, there are two bottle openers. One looks like a regular key.)
17// Wadded up receipts and gum wrappers. Usually there are many, many more and they are accompanied by crumpled, expired coupons.
18// A Tick Twister for removing ticks because I’m a fur mama. (See also: I live in the woods.)
19// Keys for the farm buggy/the vehicle that gets me out of the driveway in the winter.
20// An assortment of cheap sunglasses. My sunglasses theory is similar to my hair band theory except with this addition: the cheaper the sunglasses, the less likely I am to lose them.
21// My cell phone. We have a love/hate relationship but I really couldn’t live with out it.
22// Not pictured: mystery crumbs. I rarely put food in my purse, and when I do, it’s a granola bar still in the wrapper. I have no idea where the crumbs come from, but they kind of gross me out.
Honorable mentions (not in the purse right now, but they can usually be found there):
23// Makeup bag. Often accompanies me everywhere I go, but rarely gets opened once I leave the house, despite containing additional hair ties which I clearly need.
24// My camera. The good blogger in me has intentions of taking pictures of everything I do/see/eat, but the bad blogger in me drinks wine and forgets. Or drinks wine and takes blurry “action shots”. Whoops.
So, yeah, there’s a lot going on in there. I get why Mr. B is afraid to blindly stick his hand in my purse. You really never knows what you might find in there.
What’s lurking in your handbag?